This morning I was worshipping to the song, “Find Me,” by Jonathan David and Melissa Helser.  The song says, “Like the dust that you first held in the garden where you knelt, pull me up against your face again, ’til the breath of your hope fills the depths of my soul, ’til all I know is I’ve been found by love.”

During the song, I was first an observer, as the Lord Jesus knelt down and began to gather the soil in front of him with His strong arms, into an embrace that formed His son, Adam.  I watched as the particles of light, that were the soil, shimmered and sparkled with colors, while forming the beautiful face and arms of a sleeping son who already wore a contented smile on his face.  Adam lay on his side in the now red soil.  As Jesus formed him, He was already embracing him, leaning over him, the way I lean over my own precious daughter.

In the same way that I press my face against hers, Jesus was pressing His face against Adam’s as He breathed life into his son, all the while smiling excitedly, like any new father.  His eyes were full of wondrous anticipation.

Everything around us was full of life and singing in fluid color, in living light sparkling everywhere.  There was not audible laughter, but palpable smiles and laughter in the air, on the breeze, on the dew, in the trees, in the ants as we now walked through the garden together.  Giggles were overheard from the nearby river.  Smiles reverberated in the taut muscles of the big cats to my touch, as they walked along with us, light shimmering on the tip of every hair.  Everything in creation is celebrating the birth of the son born to the creator.

Peace in our spirits, peace in our hearts.  The experience of joy, peace, contentedness, laughter, refreshment and rest; at once all of these playing together in the ozone-like Presence, who presses a gentle kiss on my forehead as I breathe Him in, a smile on my lips and tears in my eyes.  He smells of sunshine and a cool breeze on a summer morning.

Suddenly I am savoring a fruit filled with light and life.  As I spit the seeds it bears, like a child, I feel the seed’s restful sighs as they fall into the good soil of His life, His light, His smile, His laughter.  They are pressed into their cozy bed by His scarred hands and watered with His loving embrace.  In His embrace new life springs up again!

Do you know that there are stories that are “not yet”? They have not happened yet, or have happened, but have not been written and shared, not been lived or dreamed about. … or – just not yet. This is one of these – “not yet” stories.

SOAP BUBBLES

A girl of 7 or 8 was sitting with a boy, Jesus, around the same age, at the edge of a cliff. She was dressed in a simple half-length cotton dress – light grey with bright yellow sunflowers on it. Her hair was braided in 2 thin blond braids down to her shoulders. However, since her head was constantly moving, there was no peace for her braids.

People often say about such children – “like a wind”! Even if she was sitting still, something in her was moving, even if it was because of inertia. Jesus was very similar in this sense, but also completely different, because there was a peace in him. It is a peace that must be written with a capital P – Peace! Deep and flowing. Peace that is not emptying you, but fills you up, until you are so full that it overflows and you just cannot sit still.

Kids were sitting on a stone pier that was stretching way into a sea. Their feet were dangling over the waves. Sea was in a playful mood and tried making different shoes on the children’s’ feet. White, fluffy and changing shape. There were boots up to their knees, there were slick slippers and fancy crystal ones with intricate green seaweed decors. However, the children were immersed in a more serious job and often did not even notice the hard work of the sea waves.

The children were working on blowing soap bubbles! Have you ever made soap bubbles? You know if you blow too hard, they will burst. In addition, if you don’t blow hard enough they will not form. Then you try to make the bubble as big as possible! Or, as many as possible with one breath.

So they were blowing soap bubbles, watching them fly around and enjoying the sun reflections and colors in them. The girl for a moment forgot her bubbles and with a half-opened mouth looked at the wonder-bubbles, made by Jesus. Well, these were not regular bubbles at all… sometimes wonderful animals like bears, made from clouds, flew over the sea… or huge white and purple fluffy balls with glistening wings like a hummingbird appeared, then they suddenly started to hum. From these balls a pink elephant trunk with diamonds on it popped out. And then butterflies popped out from diamonds… and then the bubble exploded! Butterflies scattered all around and, to the joy of the children, sat on their hair.

However, Jesus was blowing yet another bubble already, and this time it looked like a city. If you looked into it, you could see people walking on streets, horses grazing in fields, houses with bright glowing colors and flowers were blooming right out of the roofs and trees where growing downwards from clouds, toward the people, with roots growing deep into heaven.

The city flew up above the sea… Jesus was making his next bubble, looking straight at the girl. A huge eagle appeared in front of her eyes and she saw herself sitting on the eagle’s back! The eagle opened its mouth and … the bubble exploded into small golden fluffs that snowed over them.

“It’s not fair! You didn’t allow me to fly even a bit!” protested the girl
“I didn’t allow you?” asked Jesus
“Yes! It exploded!” cried the girl
“Because it’s mine,” said Jesus, “Try it yourself!”

I took a deep breath and tried. Peace came first. Then, a conviction that I CAN, and then… Yahoo! I started to laugh, because, while blowing my bubble, I understood that I AM already flying! Somewhere deep beneath me the sea was surging and trying to catch me, worrying like an anxious godmother about a restless child. I will hurt myself!!! Girls should not behave like this!!! Nevertheless, I was enjoying the freedom and the flight. Cities, fields, mountains and valleys, peoples faces and huge angel’s strong shields that protect cities and nations….

I opened my eyes and looked at the sea. Jesus was sitting next to me.
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
“Wow!”
“Yea!” Jesus replied, smiling.
“But, I was blowing before that too, but nothing worked.”
“You have to choose. Do you want to fly, or to be mad?” Jesus said, looking at me with peace.

I thought about it and allowed the anger that piled up in me, to come up. Anger almost got stuck in my throat. Tears rushed in my eyes and spilled over on my cheeks. Anger tightened my lips and I had to collect all my strength to blow a bubble. I took a deep breath, looked at Jesus and blew. Something muddy and greenish-black started to grow before my eyes. It had many thorns, horns and scars. It grew, spread and swelled, making rumbling sounds. My fears, from what I saw, blew the monster’s skin and made something like a shell. I froze inside and the monster grew.

Jesus leaned towards me and asked quietly:

“Would you like to keep it or will you let me fight with it?”
“What?” I asked.  I shook, because I was almost hypnotized by the monster I created. I looked at Jesus, who looked with interest at the murky monster and me in freezing armor.  He said, “I am asking if you would like to keep it. Or maybe you will give it to me?”

Do you know how a nine-year-old boy’s face changes, when he is about to face a new adventure, with fighting and exploits?
“SO, can I!? Please!”  He was actually pleading with me! I could not understand his excitement, but he is my friend, so, “Sure! Be my guest.”

I have no idea where He came up with the sword, but there it was. He stood up and, with a victory scream on his lips; he jumped and pushed the sword right into the middle of the ugly monster. Explosion, smoke and then the greenish slug started to rain down.

Jesus leaped with the joy of victory!  “Come on!” He shouted at me with joy. “Come on! Let’s celebrate! There goes your anger and fear!! Uhoo!!! Yeaaaa!!!”

He kept screaming and jumping along the pier. I could no longer sit. I joined Him! Then we were jumping, running, and screaming on the pier. Sea was joining us, by dressing us in the armor of white wave foam.

“Joy joy joy!!! Freedom and glory to the warrior Jesus!!! He is mighty and strong! He wins!! YEA!!!” I was screaming from the top of my lungs. “He is STRONGER than my fears! He is stronger than my anger! He is stronger than the world!! Yes He Is!!”

And we were dancing, leaping, and singing.

When no breath was left, we were laying down on the pier and watching the skys and I said, “You know, it is much more fun to blow monsters when you are near.”
“I am near you all the time. But I wish you would let me fight them for you.” He replied gently with the longing for new victory that only a nine-year old boy could have.

You know the stories that are or could be. Or they have been or perhaps they have even never stopped being at all. So, just close your eyes, breathe deep and …. blow! 🙂

Identity. Authority. Trust.

Christmas 2017 –  Today is a rainy Christmas day. I went on one of my walks with my dog. I have a big and gentle bull-mastiff, Greta.  With her Big athletic body and sand color, she looks more like a lioness. Full of power and spring in every step she makes. She looks at you with her dark and smushy face and from afar she is a site to behold. People that don’t know her usually stop and give way to her in respect. Respect that comes from the strength they see in her. But Greta doesn’t know that. She feels and believes she is a small couch dog. She is often insecure and will stop and not go near new people or places. She stops and sniffs and considers the danger. She considers whether she wants to risk approaching these new people or obstacles on her path.

I was walking on the grey and wet field on the steps of huge mountains. It is grey here but if you lift your gaze up, you will see the white and amazing winter… I stand in a wet grey world, but just a few hundred meters up, there are white, bright, awesome snow-covered trees and ice covered slopes of mountain. There was white and clean winter.

“I want to talk to you God. I want to learn to listen to you!”

• “Hm?” smiled God
• “No, really! I want to learn to listen to what YOU want to say to me! So, now from this tree, all the way to the over that field, until the next gate I will be SILENT and listen!”

God started laughing! “Will you now?!” He laughed…

Oh well… I could not. My mind drifted away to dogs and Greta who is struggling with sevier allergies, to winter, to projects I am working on … until I grabbed it back to God and my wish to listen instead of whining or asking Him for something again.

“But I WANT TO LISTEN! Really!!!” I protested out loud. God just silently laugh again. “Ok, Who am I?” My mind wondered on the path of its own. “You are my beloved daughter!” He answered.

I have never had a dad. So, I don’t know what it means. In scriptures I read that to those that accepted Him, Jesus give the authority to become the sons and daughters of the God most high. Those that believe in His word. / John 1:12/
Authority …
Belief…
I pondered: “Acquiescence, acceptance, and believing that ALL that happens with me and my life will come/ will be turned for good, because I am a beloved daughter of God. Because He loves me.
He does not save me out from the bad things because bad things happened to all of us in this world. He does not intervene to save me from the bad things but He TURNS the bad things to my advantage. He warns me about their approach, not to torture me and laugh about or take pleasure in my misery and fear, but to reassure me that He KNOWS and He is in control and that He is able to turn it around and He will, because He Loves me and I am His daughter.
Because He would love me to run to Him
and cry to Him
and receive comfort from Him
and reasurance that He knows,
He understands,
and He WILL turn this situation for my good. For me to learn, to gain, to grow. And even If I don’t see the “good” outcome I can still go to Him and trust because He is my father.”

• “Do you believe in that?” asked God.
• “I don’t know.” I replied. Walking on, I continued talking to God. ” I have never had a father. It makes sense. But I am not sure that my heart believes in it. I would assume that if my Father CAN change things or make them stop or give something I am asking for, that He WOULD!”
• “Do you give that to your kids?” He asked.
• “Yes!”
• “Always? Also when they must learn something they do not want to learn? Or when you are not letting Jacob (my son) get something he wants and he is screaming mad at you? Or when he is facing consequences of his actions and is hurting. Do you want him to come to you?”
• “Yes!”
• “Do you feel his pain?”
• “Yes!”
• “Do you want him to have what he wants, or do you want for him to learn even if he is hurting, while learning it? Would you just give in to him because you CAN or do you want him to learn the lesson to the end?”
• “I want him to learn. But… if I can, I would still want to give him what he is asking me for.”
• “I know 🙂 But I do too!”  We walked in silence for a while, then I heard a question: “Just for the sake of discussion. Would you now imagine how it would feel, how it would look if you KNEW you have a Father who does love you? A Father who understands you completely. A Father who wants you to go to him with your hurts and frustrations in trust that He loves you and accepts you where you are. Imagine that your Father is the almighty King and that you, as His daughter, do have all authority given by Him. That you are safe because all that is happening to you is controlled by Him. That He is right here with you! That you are walking with His cloak and aid and authority. How would that look ? 🙂 How would you walk and look around? How would you feel if you would believe in it and would TRUST in it?”

I breathed in deeper. My shoulders relaxed. I suddenly felt taller. I smiled. I imagined that cloak of His… sparkling, made from millions of tiny particles of shimmering droplets of water or diamonds. I could almost see that cloak descending on my shoulders. I felt beautiful and treasured. It is such a great, great feeling to feel beautiful and treasured and protected. I wanted to run and laugh and dance and be silly all at the same time. I felt peace and well being and I wondered what could I do if all of it would be real.

• “I want to heal my dog! If I have the authority and You said there is coming restoration to my family, I really want for Greta to be healed! You did give authority to Adam and Eve over the earth and living beings. So I want to proclaim life over Greta.”
• “Do it!” God said smilingly.
• “But what if she will not get well?” I will be disappointed again.  I was traying to aplay all the ideas from this walk. ” If all of this is real, but Greta does not get better does that mean that you have an even better plan for her and my faith and trust in you? What could that be?”
• “She will get well. I want you to learn the authority you have.”
• “I have the authority of the beloved daughter, is that what you are teaching me?  I don’t know what that means!”
• “I know you don’t,” smiled God.

I was walking and smiling and pondering on these awesome new ideas. I had the feeling of the sparkling new mantle covering my shoulders, extending behind me and over me. A cover and protection for a princess. New me. New me?

One more memory surfaced, I remembered a conversation where a person was teaching and  saying, “…Which self is talking? The new self or old self?”  “I am not interested in talking to the old you!” When I hear things like that, I feel so rejected. I can never measure up to that exalted great place of being that new me. I feel like the one desperately stuck in the pit of my old self. Whatever that meant. Depressive, fearful, whining, old me. ME. And to become new means to die. “DIE. I cannot die! I don’t want to die. I have struggled all my life to survive! To stay alive! And if you cannot accept me as I am, … then I am staying here in this pit of despair and depression and pain and fear alone. But ALIVE.”

I could all but feel God smiling and waiting on me to “get it.”   So… I pondered on,

• “So it is not about me dying?”
• “No.”
• “It is about knowing who I am and who You are? And believing in it? And trusting in it?
• “Yes”
• “I don’t know how. I am not sure I can.”
• “Yet.” He commented smilingly.

We walked on and I saw a scene of Him sitting with one scared and despairing me, in the huge and lonely muddy ditch.  I understood Him to say, “Just so you know, I love you even when you’re sitting in that pit of yours. I will never leave you. I just want you to see that I am there with you.” He continued, “You are not alone. So trust me. I am not disgusted or impatient or surprised over whatever emotions you have. where do you think hope comes from? Who makes you smile and encourages you to take one more step? Who arranges for that “stupid” song to play, the one that makes you sing along and switches your dark mood to a better one? From where does the joy come to you while you are stuck? I love you! And I very much want you to stay alive!”

“Oh, what a relief!” I smiled. “I don’t have to die. I have to believe. I have to trust. Can I? I have to know who He is and who I am.”

“And this year I want you to learn the authority you have,” commented God on my thoughts.

It is a rainy, grey day. I was walking with my dog who does not know the power and strength she possesses. I don’t know the authority I have. I was walking in hope. Smiling, basking in an imaginary world I let my self believe in, even if it is just for one 30-minute walk on the rainy day with my dog.

It is a raining day and God was walking with His daughter and her dog. Her shoulders were covered with a splendid mantel that is made of millions of shimmering white diamonds.

I once taught third grade in a Christian School.  At the beginning of my second year, a scruffy boy, by the name of Nick shuffled into my classroom.  His grin warmed my heart, but his behaviors didn’t.  He hadn’t fit into the public school senerio, and his family had hit rough places; So, to Christian School he came.  I have this thing for underdogs though.  Broken families, broken kids, new kid on the block not fitting in, these things always hit home.  So, Nick and I began to get to know one another, and I became his cheerleader.

The last day of school, before Christmas break, the children all filed into the classroom holding their Christmas treasures to give their teacher.  Some proudly presented them like  “We Three Kings”, others shly place it in my hands, and some shove it in front of me with indifference because mom made them.  Standing in my door, waiting for my last student to push the glass door to the building open, I watched as Nick made a dash down the hall, with a hugh grin painted across his face, his present clutched by both sweaty hands.

Halfway to me,  his feet tangled beneath him.  Time suspended as he tumbled to the floor in a broken, dejected mess.  His gift shattered between his fingers as it slammed against the tiled floor.   But far worse the shattered heart of a young boy lay at my feet.  Bending over I scooped the present up.  “Nick, are you hurt?  Can you get up, honey?”. He just nodded his head, unable to speak as hot tears rolls down his flushed cheeks.  The glass Santa holding a bag of candy was in pieces in my hands.  “Nick, thank you for the gift.  It’s beautiful. I will glue this back together, and Nick I will keep it forever.  Thank you so much!”  A small glimmer of gratitude began to peek through Nick’s eyes.  He slowly got up and hugged me.

Twenty some years later, I find myself back in the classroom, part time.  At the staff Christmas party, I brought a gift to exchange that I had thoughtfully picked out knowing that the value was at least double what it appeared.  I put it in a plain envelope with a ribbon and placed it in the middle of the pile.  As the teachers one by one picked the gifts not knowing their contents, they grabbed the one’s daintly decorated.  My plain gift lay on the floor til the last.  The teacher who got it eagerly opened it, but as she looked at it, she didn’t recognize the value or know the boutique, so a look of scorn crossed her face.  What had been my treasure had now become her trash. Embarrassment filled me and my cheeks grew hot.

My mind flashed back to Nick and my little glued together Santa that often has sat in my kitchen these past twenty years.    His trash had become my treasure.  His embarrassment had eased away into pleasure knowing he had pleased me.  I then thought of a baby wrapped in a manger.

The creator of the universe wrapped the greatest treasure, the most precious present to mankind in rags and placed him in the simple, frail arms of poor girl at a time of vicious dictatorship.  Most didn’t recognize the value of the gift.  They scorned him.  They saw the treasure of heaven as trash.  Few looked hard enough, with an open heart to see what truly was cuddled in Mary’s arms.  And they missed him.  They missed the savior of the world.  But the shepherds, the lowest class of the low, didn’t miss him.

God does things in such upside down ways. He knew His son would be rejected, a man of sorrows, from whom men would turn their faces away.  Isaiah, hundreds of years before Jesus, prophesied it would be so.  He chooses the lowest of the low, the foolish things of this world to confound the wise.  I find that true today.

He often takes the least of these, the lowest of the low, and somehow, if they will let Him, makes beautiful masterpieces out of their lives.  He’s really good at that.

So, I find myself looking for Him in places many wouldn’t think to look.  In the face of the new kid on the block, or the orphan, or the homeless, or the single mom, or the elderly woman…  Do you see trash or treasure?  Do you recognize the mark of Jesus, maybe where others won’t?  Oh, I’ve been guilty of the scornful look too.  But I know how broken I’ve been, and what He’s done in me.  Maybe that’s why I look for Him in broken places, because He is there.

My hope is you will take time with an open heart to see Him in unexpected places this season.  He loves hiding treasure in what most see as trash.

In the above video, Simon Cowell is wrecked and made speechless.  This guy, who has a reputation of having a hard heart, to say the least, is overcome by real human emotions.

Have you ever had your opinion about a person radically change in one moment of seeing their true heart?  Whether I’ve judged a person as bad, or wrong, mean, despicable or worse; all of that goes away when my heart is touched by love.

When, in a moment, a person I have judged becomes a human being in my eyes, someone with a story, someone with real emotions, real pain, real heartache, all my clueless opinions lose their power.   Suddenly my spirit sees them with fresh eyes and longs to comfort, longs to help, longs to hold.

Our eyes are open to see the tender heart in that child of God that they normally conceal behind the fig leaves.

In the New Year, let’s persevere in asking our Father to open the eyes of our heart and see people the way He sees them, so that we can love them the way He loves them.

I pray that we might see one another as family, that we would give each other tenderness, understanding, the benefit of the doubt and love.  In the New Year, let us love others the way we want to be loved.  Let’s love people the way Jesus loves us.

I wrote this 9 months ago, but felt, with some editing, it deserved a second look.  I hope you think so too:

In the little, 2 chapter, Book of Haggai, the Lord says to His people, “Why are you living in luxurious houses while my house lies in ruins?” (Hag 1:4) 17 years earlier, about a year after their return from Babylon, by order of the pagan King Cyrus of the Persians, the Jewish people had laid the foundation of the Temple and the first layer of the wall.

Cyrus was the most powerful king on the planet at the time. Isaiah had prophesied about Cyrus, by name, some 150 years before his birth. God had chosen Cyrus and set him in power to give the Jews financial and political support to rebuild the Temple of God in Jerusalem.

The Jews had gone to Jerusalem with earnest intentions of rebuilding.  After their strong start, however, they were threatened and ridiculed by enemy nations.  They needed to survive in the harsh conditions .  They allowed these distractions to keep them from completing their tasks.

Even after they had established their homes and resources, it just never seemed like the right time to continue with their assignment. It was easy to keep adding to their own homes and their own lifestyles. They were living in luxury, but at the same time, they lived in fear of the enemy, and were subject to intimidation.

The same can be said of the Church in the West today. We live in the greatest level of wealth the world has ever seen, yet only about 10% of professing believers think it is important to put your money where your mouth is when it comes to God.  We live in fear of the opinions of our neighbors, our co-workers, the general public.

Though we have plenty of everything, we constantly seek more. Just like the Jews in Haggai’s time, we are unsatisfied and always searching for more food, more drink, more stimulation, more things to satisfy our spiritual hunger and thirst. We seek comfort in newer and ever greater cars, houses, TVs, electronics… stuff, but we don’t put God first or turn to God for our fulfillment. (Haggai 1:3-7) As a result we are fat, depressed, over-stimulated, in debt and starving for true nourishment. Just saying…

When the remnant of the Jewish people, now living under King Darius, heard the rebuke from the Lord through Haggai, they repented by agreeing together and getting to work. Immediately our good savior sent this message of encouragement, “I am with you, says the Lord!” (Haggai 1:13) So the people got to work rebuilding the Lord’s house. I love the Lord. He asks so little of us before He can’t resist encouraging us!

When they got to work, he sent His Spirit and gave the whole group enthusiasm for the work ahead of them. (Hag 1:14) We would say that REVIVAL had come to them.

Notice the order of events: They got to work in obedience, THEN revival came to them.

In the West, we never seem to find the right time to obey Jesus’ simple command to us to, “heal the sick, raise the dead, cure those who have leprosy and cast out demons.”(Matt 10:8 NLT)  We worry, “What if I pray for someone and they don’t get healed?” “Will people think I’m a religious nut?” “Will I make God look bad?”  We want to see the evidence that “it works” before we step out “in faith.” But the Lord sent His encouragement after the people got to work.

Back to Haggai, a few months later the Lord sent another message through the prophet, “Does anyone remember this house-the Temple-in its former splendor? How in comparison does it look to you now? It must seem like nothing at all!”

“But the Lord said, ‘Be Strong…and now get to work, for I am with you, says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. My Spirit remains among you just as I promised when you came out of Egypt, so do not be afraid’.” (Haggai 2:3-5) Remember, this was under the old covenant when the Holy Spirit came on people and also could go away. How much more can we be certain of the Lord’s support in the work He has assigned us when His Spirit lives inside  us and will NEVER leave us? “Be strong, my Spirit remains among you so don’t be afraid.”

This talk about the former glory of the Temple speaks to me of the state of the Church in the West today. Does anyone find inspiration from the Book of Acts? That, in my opinion, is the former glory of the church. When the church walked in humility and in power and changed the World.

What would the Church look like today, if we had kept our first love and continued fulfilling Jesus’ commandments? We should be walking in greater glory now than the first century church. Instead we look to that time of former glory as the good old days.

But we don’t need to look in our rear view mirror, because Jesus said, “if you have faith as small as a mustard seed…Nothing will be impossible for you.”(Matt 17:20 NIV) Indeed, today the Church in developing countries is moving in the love and the power of the Holy Spirit.

In many places around the world, believers regularly see blind eyes opened, missing limbs restored, people raised from the dead and former strangers to Jesus whose lives are transformed by knowing Him. “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever.” (Hebrews 13:8 NIV)

The comparatively few believers in the first century church, with their great faith, were said to have “turned the world upside-down” with simple acts of love as demonstrated by Jesus. Now we number in the millions, but in the West the church is seen as a powerless anachronism or worse, a political persuasion. To the outside world, it does indeed seem like “nothing at all.” (Hag 2:3)

But we have good news! Like the people of Haggai and Nehemiah’s time, we can choose to change! We can repent and turn from the patterns of this world and be transformed by the renewing of our minds and by obedience to the things we have been called to do. The power of the gospel has not diminished, nor has the Holy Spirit within us lost His power.

Today, thanks to a new King Cyrus in the USA, President Trump, who is extremely supportive of the church, we too have a window of opportunity to repent and get to work. I pray we have eyes to see and understand the times we are living in. Imagine the potential impact we can have if the Church comes together now in answer to Jesus’ prayer for unity.  NOT for political reasons, but as the family of God.

The Work We Are Called to Do:  Jesus left us a few commands that in the West, we have largely ignored. Here are the most visible ones:

• Love:  ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’  (Matt 22:36-40, AMP)

• Move Quickly When Others Need Help:  “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you” (Matt 7:12 NIV)

• Overlook Theological Differences in Favor of Unity:  “Teacher,” said John, “we saw a man driving out demons in your name and we told him to stop, because he was not one of us.” “Do not stop him,” Jesus said. “No one who does a miracle in my name can in the next moment say anything bad about me, for whoever is not against us is for us,” (Mark 9:38-40 NIV)

• Walk in Your Authority:  “Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse those who have leprosy, drive out demons. Freely you have received, freely give” (Matt 10:8 NIV).

• Be Ready:  “You also must be ready all the time, for the Son of Man will come when least expected.” (Luke 12:40)

“ I will fill this place with glory, says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. The silver is mine, and the gold is mine, says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. The future glory of this Temple will be greater than its past glory, says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies. And in this place I will bring peace. I, the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, have spoken!” (Haggai 2:7-9)

This promise fills me with hope.  I am anticipating that our Temple, the Church ,will soon have wisdom, discipline and obedience to steward the gold and silver that comes in from the nations for Kingdom purposes.

But I think, as in history, it will come when we begin to walk in obedience to the Lord. Some things are trusted to the servants who steward well the little.

He said that He will bring peace to this place (the Temple/Church), but first He will fill it with glory! How will that be? I believe it will be after we begin walking in obedience.

Our obedience as earthen vessels makes way for the power and the glory of God to be revealed to the world. When we are obedient, He can do things through us that are so clearly beyond our own ability, that He is glorified.

Currently, in our Western lifestyles, daily spiritual opposition may not be an obvious threat of death, as it so often is in many places around the world. But opposition may come in the form of our fear of other people’s opinions.  It may come in worldly or even churchy distractions from our real assignment. Many times, warfare is as simple as believing the word of God and choosing to be obedient in the moment.

I don’t know about you, but when I see our Father face to face, I don’t want to regret the people I didn’t reach because I was embarrassed about what others would think of me.

I don’t want to remember the lame excuses and distractions I let come between me and obedience.

For believers, there is no punishment at the judgement, but I will not receive crowns of glory either.  Remember the crowns I receive are what I get to throw back at His feet to glorify Him.

That word “obedience” can sound boring or restrictive, but in truth it is our greatest freedom. Consider the freedom of letting the Father decide what I’m doing today, how, and when, and then doing as I’m told without responsibility or credit for the result. It is fulfilling and energizing.

That is what Jesus meant when he told His disciples, “My food is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work.” (John 4:32 NIV) Like good food, obedience is nourishing and energizing. He did what He saw his Father doing, and said what He heard His Father saying. Then he got to watch the Kingdom come to Earth. Fulfilled! Nourished! Victorious!

I pray this little Book of Haggai will serve as a rally cry to our family, the Church. God promises us in Haggai that if we get to work on the things He has assigned us, then He Himself will be our peace.

We have been sleeping in our luxurious houses for too long! It is time to rebuild the Lord’s house. It is time for the nations to see the people of the Lord demonstrating His love, His might, His power to the world around us and overcoming the work of the enemy.

In the New Year, may the Lord bless you with His peace. May you see the world being turned upside-down in the wake of His love everywhere you go. May you be nourished, and victorious, and fulfilled by the heavenly food of obedience. The coming glory of the Church will be greater than the former glory!  Revival begins with you.

Last night as I got off the phone after a conversation about preparing the way of the Lord, I heard, “It’s time to get rid of some more stones on the road.” So, when I woke up this morning, He said, “Come take a walk with me.” I have not walked and gone to my secret place with Him in over a week, not since encountering an intrusive runner. My secret place for the last month has taken the form of a stone table under a blossoming tree facing the sunrise near our home.

Last week, a male runner distracted my attention multiple times and invaded my space to the point I felt somewhat violated by his presence. I have never carried pepper spray, but after talking with my husband, we felt for the first time in my adult life, I should carry some in my pocket. So, I took my pepper spray and headed out the door. I immediately felt irritated, like something gnawing beneath my skin. I was mad, and I wanted to use strong words to express my displeasure, but I am supposed to be spending time with the Almighty, and had been pretty much dodging Him for a week. He had said the last time, He wanted to give me compassion for the abuser, and then this skinny, sweaty runner invades my space forcing me to come out armed. Papa nudged me, encouraging me to share how I felt with Him, so I did.

I quickly began to realize that not only had I been angry with this unknown man, but I was pretty miffed at God for revealing our secret place. I felt exposed by God.

When I say I saw a vision, I mean I see a picture in my head, and sometimes that image almost looks like an overlay on what I’m actually seeing. My feet continued to pad the ground toward my destination. There in front of me I see an image of Jesus on the ground. I heard Him say, “Take your anger out on me then. I can handle it.” He lay there completely vulnerable to my angry fists balled up. I thought of Him willingly being beaten for my sins, His precious flesh hanging like ribbons. I couldn’t do it, and found myself crying, “It wasn’t your fault.”

Realizing this is going much deeper than what happened last week, I began to let Him go deeper in my heart. Then He said, “Who’s to blame?” I could hear me shouting my name. The self accusations flew again, “I was not strong enough to stop evil. Something was wrong with me. I was to blame.” I saw an image of my mom slapping me across the face, which happened multiple times growing up. I saw myself as worthless, helpless, internalizing shame, that I was unfixable. I was bad. Now barely able to see thru my hot tears, and slightly embarrassed at my avalanche of emotions, I kept my face towards the ground.

Finally, I sat down at my rock table. Jesus said, “So this little girl, this is the one you blame”, and I saw myself about age three sitting across from me at the table. He then began to tell me how He sees this little one. Innocent, strong, blameless, one willing to lay down her life for others, pure, brave, loved, full of love, safe, and a safe person. I was undone.

Then He said, “So who’s to blame, those who hurt you?”, and I saw a line of little children. I decided it was best not to answer Him this time, nor did He give me a chance. I heard Him say, “I will hold them accountable for their choices, but did they start off as abusers, or were they abused, hurt little children themselves? Did they not believe lies told to them? You did not choose into becoming an abuser, even when you were forced to abuse, but even for those who did, I have compassion for them, for I see them as little, broken children.”

“So, who is to blame then? The evil forces of darkness, the spiritual forces, that lie and deceive my creation, that is where the blame lies. But I am far greater than even this. It’s time to let these old mind sets go. It’s a process I know.”

A process for sure. Layer after layer. Deeper and deeper still. His love is unrelenting sometimes. But I’ve learned that even if His touch causes pain in opening a wound, it’s always to bring healing.

“I want you to write the little girl sitting at the table a letter,” He whispered in my ear as the breeze gently blew the new, baby leaves of the tree above me. And so I did… A letter of healing, of forgiveness, of identity. A tear stained letter. I left my secret place that day a little lighter, a little freer.

“I don’t want you to get discouraged at this process of healing” I heard the Lord say.

You may often hear people liken our hearts, and inner healing, to an onion. There are layers to the process. While our hurt could be likened to the odor of an onion that is not very pleasant to think about.

But take the bloom of a rose instead. I would rather liken my heart to a beautiful rose.

The reason I think of the rose particularly is because it is completely enclosed, wrapped tightly with petals, but a beautiful bloom awaits to emerge. Our heart can be like this when we hide things away, put up walls and close off the world from reaching our heart.

As you begin to go through the internal healing process, you begin to open up just as the flower begins to open. Revealing the colors inside, the fragrance, shape and ultimately revealing the beautiful blossom that God created and intended it to be. Each petal is representing an emotion or wound, proving that God can take things that were hidden, dormant and distorted then turn it into something beautiful again.

It takes light, nourishment and water for that flower to blossom. As we too need to be nurtured and fed to bloom again! We must renew our minds and spirits daily by reading His word, abiding in His presence and walking in a worshipful lifestyle. This is so important to staying free once we receive our healing.

I like to use the rose as an example because it has thorns on it’s stem. When we think of thorns we think of something that could inflict pain or be a nuisance. Thorns actually help cultivate the environment where the rose bush grows. It’s a natural tiller of the soil. Thorns also help protect the beautiful bloom that awaits at the end of the stem.

When was the last time you just went and grabbed hold of a rose and picked it off? Probably never. You wouldn’t do that without the proper tool or gloves.  In nature thorns protect the bloom from predators and other pests. In the same way a thorn cultivates and protects the rose, so do the circumstances in our life, and so does our beautiful God cultivate and protect our heart. Many times I made the decision to “grab” the blossom in life without thinking I had to go through the thorns.

Our very own Lord Jesus wore a crown of thorns. The Roman soldiers thought they were humiliating Him by placing a measly crown of thorns on His head but instead they were just placing them on the beautiful rose He was. He is even called the Rose of Sharon. Ironic isn’t it.

Rose bushes can withstand some pretty rough storms. The rains may wash the petals off but the winds can seldom destroy the bush. I’d like to think of us as these beautiful blooms waiting to blossom. It is only when we allow Christ to be the gardener of our hearts, that we can become all that He has designed and intended us to be.