Love. What is that elusive concept? I feel sometimes I’ve been chasing after whatever that word is all my life.

Often I have felt a large deficit, especially in the area of loving myself or feeling loved. A few days ago, upon waking, I found myself longing for love. The Holy Spirit gently pointed to the wall around my heart, and said, “We still need to take that down, love. You thought you had to protect your self from me, others, even yourself, but I want to take the rest of that down. Just rest back into my love.”

While hanging up my husband’s clothes last night, ( I know… Such a spiritual time right?) I found myself praying for a friend, and as I prayed, “Lord, I know they love you,” I heard in response,” No, they don’t.”  Immediately, I found myself arguing with God. Then, I gently heard with no condemnation, “If you hate your brother, you don’t love me.  There are many believers in the church, but not many lovers.  Lovers love me by obeying me and by choosing to walk in forgiveness even when they are not feeling love.  Love is not a feeling.  It is an action.” I was stunned. I thought of all the times I had just been a believer, not a lover.

Then sweetly the Lord said, “You don’t think you have enough love, because you still struggle with bad thoughts, and negative emotions, but you consistently obey me. You consistently walk in forgiveness, even when it’s very hard. That’s love. It’s an action!” I walked out of our bedroom with new hope, and more fire to be a lover, not just a believer. May that be what we are all moving towards and walking in.