War Horse

Religion seeks to snuff out the voices of the sons and daughters of God.  It tries to silence them through control, manipulation, and fear.  But our Father in heaven delights in the relationship born out of trust, respect, and love.  He gives us our voice, and He wants us to use it for Him, in submission to His word.
We don’t have to defend ourselves in that process.  He delights in defending us when we are in step with Him.  We can confidently rely on Him.
It’s not easy to trust, stepping out into the great unknown, but I will take His hand and step, because He is worth it.
Growing up, I had no ability to defend myself or to voice the injustices and victimization done to me.  There was no safe place or safe people to run too.  When the ones who should have kept me safe, were the ones inviting evil in, there was no where else to run.
So, I learned at a very young age to self protect, to hide…
Hide my pain, hide my rage, hide my fear.
As little children do, I stuffed it and became whatever I needed to be in any situation I found myself in.  As an adult this translated into depression, panic attacks, emotional numbness, physical issues.  My life was falling apart.
But Jesus began a healing process with me where He has uncovered, and healed so much of the trauma and pain. One part of this process is giving me back my voice, my ability to speak up, to be heard.

Women through out history, have been shut up, discredited, and many told that your voice doesn’t matter.  But that was never our heavenly Father’s plan.  He values His daughters and what they have to say.  He listens.

Stepping out is never easy, but for those who have been victimized by others, especially those who should have defended you, it’s can be like facing a mountain of paralyzing fear.
The other extreme for me to react out of is self protection.   Since no one would protect me, I must fight to protect myself at all cost to survive.  All my life,  I’ve gone from fetal position to fighting stance with boxing gloves on.
“It’s time to take your boxing gloves off, daughter.”. I heard my heavenly Father say recently.  “It’s time to step out with confidence that I will defend you.  You no longer need to defend yourself.  Stop trying to.”
The week before I had found myself being set up by Him.  He pushed me right into conflict, that was extremely uncomfortable.  I found Him delighting in this.  And I wasn’t happy about it.
Sometimes we learn more through conflict than anything else.  ”I’m giving you the chance to let your voice be heard.  I want you to step out and speak up.  It’s time to let your voice be heard.  You must know what’s behind the curtain.”. I knew it was the voice of my Lord.  “Trust me.”
With a deep breath, I took the step, grabbed his hand, stood up, and spoke out.  In honor and in alignment with God’s  word, I let my voice be heard.
I’d like to share with you part of a letter my heavenly Father wrote to me recently.  I believe this is a message that He wants his daughters to hear at this time.  He is restoring the voice of His daughters, restoring the roar of the lioness.
Sweet Daughter,
I love the beautiful self I made you to be.  I love your will, your thoughts, your opinions.  I love how you stand up for the weak ones, how you stand up for what’s right even when it will cost you relationship or position.  I love that about you.  I love your voice.  I love your voice.  Instead of being muzzled, I am taking the muzzle off of my daughters.
Dear one, I must completely untwist the lie that if you speak up, the enemy will shut you up and destroy you.  That is a lie.  He has tried to intimidate you, to keep you silent.  It’s time to completely remove these lies, but this is a work only I can completely do.  Only I can completely set you  free.  I am, and I will.
Stop trying to defend yourself, because I am your defender.  Let me fight for you.  You just follow me.  Just rest in me.  Get your approval and value from me.  I am enough.  I promise.  I am big enough to cover your back. I’ve got your back.
You are not rebellious children.  You are uniquely, free-willed daughters, who are submitted to the King of Kings.  Isn’t that so much more lovely than a beast of burden forced into labor through the law.  You are like majestically, strong war horses, who love their master so much they would be willing to lay down their lives for me.  I don’t desire beasts of burden who are forced into submission.  I delight in free, beautiful mares full of my glory, power, and grace submitted willfully out of love for her King.
I love you so much.  Trust me
Daughters, I believe it’s time to speak up, to step up, to roar for our King.  We do it not defending ourselves, or out of anger or fear, but with grace, dignity, and strength standing on the foundation of the truth of God’s word in loving submission to our heavenly Father.  Be the magnificent daughter He created you to be.  Your voice matters.  It is heard.  It makes a difference.

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